On having gestational diabetes

Has internet (and world) changed? Or was I walking around with selective vision before?

Everywhere I look now there are photos of gooey caramel-filled brownies, and pastries with cream fillings, and cheesecakes of every imaginable color and size. Endlessly attractive desserts, basically.

Meanwhile, I stab my fingers with that bloody glucose monitor again and go get myself another carrot, or an apple, or a cucumber, or something else along those lines.

You know how they keep on repeating that people should eat 5 servings of fruit and vegetables a day? And preferably even 7, but because 7 is a hard push then they say eat at least 5?

I've got a solution: make people have a mild case of diabetes and it's sorted. Okay, yeah, so some people will probably go onto insulin injections instead and continue eating as they've always been eating - rather than try and correct it with diet, as I have... but still.


I've got a sweet tooth, I really do. Always have, and probably will, too.

Three weeks in I am sort of starting to resent my husband - along with every other person I witness eating wonderfully gooey desserts, well, everywhere - and I am also starting to resent the green-looking vegetables in our fridge, and how the freezer is stocked with fish and chicken, and how I am probably eating more fruit and vegetables now than I ever have in my life whilst I am wanting to eat a wonderful portion of slightly bitter tiramisu instead.

So you think I've done enough complaining? Well, tough luck - I am not done yet.

I want... cheesecake. Salted butter pecan ice cream. Chocolate-covered mint cookies I can dip in my tea. Tiramisu. Raspberry-melon smoothie with mint. Rich, rich pumpkin soup.

Not little bites every now and again, but decent, filling portions!

And, for Pete's sake, I want a decent bowl of porridge for breakfast! Not wholegrain oats with green milk and a few berries for lunch, but porridge, for breakfast. I want breakfast that fills. For hours!

That lots of people have diabetes and that some people even say that diabetes is one of the best things that has ever happened to them because it's made them get healthy, result of which is that they've toned up and slimmed down and have started to eat well...

Well, good on you, guys, but I am - personally - looking forward to delivering my placenta and keeping my fingers crossed that diabetes leaves my body alongside it, because this is annoying; not as much hard as it is annoying.

There are people eating wonderfully gooey desserts all around me, all the time, writing about it on the internet, posting their photos, and I keep on seeing all this stuff around me and thinking, yeah, I guess I'll take a bite out of my apple now, and I think I have a carrot in the bottom of my bag here, too.

Tom Hanks, Elizabeth Taylor, Halle Berry, Larry King, Neil Young... the list can be long, especially if women with gestational diabetes get added (hi, Salma Hayek!), but I do not intend on being on that list.

I want my chocolate - not dark Ghana in minuscule quantities, but decent Whittaker's milk chocolate.


  1. Hey, why don't you try looking at it from another point of view: you are getting detoxed from a sugar addiction! I've never had much of a sweet tooth, in sense that I don't crave chocolates, desserts or cakes for that matter, but few weeks ago I got off from milk and coffee (and sugar as well) and that was tragic! I have the same craving you have for milk. For a glass of freaking milk! I know one day I won't bat an eye for it, but it still seems so far off. And it seems every time I open a fridge that there is nothing to eat!

    1. why d'you get off milk?

    2. Well, I'm and adult with a serious milk addiction - not a day went by with a few glasses of milk. So I quit for various reasons: my baby was fussy so I thought that may help her (and maybe it did, or maybe it was the gripe water), adults are really not supposed to have milk (I'm not a calf), also my skin has been awful for the majority of my adulthood (and it's getting better already), and I'd like to loose weight, so I really don't need the calories. That's why I quit milk.

  2. Kristina3.4.14

    Green milk?

    1. Oh, it's that... low fat milk, I think they call it "skimmed" milk - basically, instead of 2-something percent fat (which is my usual milk under normal circumstances) it's only got, like, 0,3% or something. In New Zealand they package it in containers with green stickers, so "blue milk" is ordinary milk, "light blue milk" is low fat and "green milk" is low-low-low fat milk.

  3. You're a champion! All this eating well is worth it in the end!

    I can't wait to hear what your baby girl's name is. I bet she'll be as stubborn as you! And, you'll be just as proud about too. :)