Getting to the bottom of things

As I was standing in the shower and thinking about my ballooning tummy (reference to here), I remembered a book I read about three years ago, written by Jenny McCarthy and called "Belly laughs".

In short, it's her collection of complaints and moans over being pregnant, some quite amusing, and the one story I remembered was about being so constipated she had to go to the medical centre where someone scooped the stuff out. (If you don't quite understand what "scooped" and "stuff" means in this context, I'd say think about it for another minute, because I really don't want to go into details here...)

As I was pondering that, I wondered: why would anyone want to become a proctologist?

And as any modern human nowadays would do, as I got out the shower I opened up my laptop and googled it, "Why would anyone want to become a proctologist" - and as you would imagine, I was not the first person on internet to wonder about that.

The answers are actually surprisingly... sensible.

"About fifty years ago (how time flies) a few pre-med buddies and I worked as OR techs in a community hospital. We put the same question to a very busy proctologist, affectionally known as the Rear Admiral. He laughed and looked at us very paternalistically and said, "because we have the most grateful patients." If you have ever had severe hemorrhoids or a peri-anal abscess, you would realize the truth of those words. Urologists come a close second. But I didn't discover this until late in life."

"The field is popular becuase it's a surgery field where you can still have a lifestyle. There are very few "Colorectal" emergencies (just like there are few urological or breast emergencies) so most cases are scheduled in advance. So, when you have your cases end at a certain time on Thursday so you can get to your kid's T-Ball game, you're not going to be called back because somebody with a surgical abdomen just wandered into the ED."

"Perhaps they wanted to do surgery but didn't want the crappy (no pun intended) hours of the other surgical specialties."

"They make a sh!t ton of money."

It sort of reminds me of working with sled dogs in Alaska - for all the coolness of living on a glacier, flying in/out on a helicopter and riding snowmobiles, I did spend about half my time picking up dog poop.

So here you go. I hope you were enjoying your lunch or something ;)

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